今天，看完Anne Hathaway的The Idea of You， 無論社會如何開放，姐弟戀都仍然難以被人接受，男年長，女年輕，看在別人眼中還可以接受，但身份對掉，便好像有點不順眼，我也受到這個框架影響，曾感到不太自在，儘使這個差距只是微不足道，故此我要向法國總裁致敬，我也為奇洛李維斯的戀情高興。
Hallmark 另一套向Jane Austen致敬的電影An American in Austen，女主角Hariet 活在圖書館中，她對Jane Austen的鍾愛程度似乎有點過火，甚至認為自己只能嫁給Mr Darcy。當她的男朋友花盡心思向她求婚時, 她只是回覆Maybe。她的另一半和朋友都大感失望。
怎料， 她竟然如願以償, 投入了Pride and Prejudice 的故事當中, 成為Bennet家於美國居住的遠房親戚，Mr Darcy更對她另眼相看。她作為Jane的粉絲,又怎樣能夠「順其自然」,讓Darcy愛上自己,而不是Elizabeth。她的加入，令Elizabeth 變得忙亂，差點誤嫁給情場騙子Mr Wickham。
Prince Charles sought to mend his relationship with William following Diana’s passing William. He could sense his son’s unspoken anger and immense sadness, recognising that without addressing these emotions, genuine communication between them would be impossible.
When William confronted his father, he held Charles responsible for failing to protect his beloved mother from the paparazzi and the fatal car crash. In reality, William was weary of the constant “protection” himself. Would life be fun without constant surveillance, especially at parties?
The weight of his future role as king had never felt as heavy as it did when he walked behind Diana’s coffin. He wanted to avoid the overwhelming attention that came with his position, a stark contrast to his mother’s ease in public despite her efforts to evade the paparazzi.
A candid conversation with his grandfather revealed William’s deep-seated fear of being constantly watched by the world, now that he had taken Diana’s place as the centre of attention. Despite his handsome appearance and regal stature, he struggled to embrace his role as the object of affection for countless young girls.
Charles, too, was grieving over Diana’s death, sharing in his son’s pain.
While at university, William found solace in the condolence letters he received from people. The memory of Diana’s warm smile continued to resonate with many, despite her imperfections.
The last episode of season 6 of The Crown set the end of this TV series. With Camilla marrying Charles eventually, there is nothing more the royal fans would love to see earnestly except the marriage story of Kate and William. However, it is just a fraction of a story that can attract viewers to follow the whole season. Anything else? How about the infamous adventure of Harry and Meghan? A strong no from many viewers, thank you.
I can relate to how the writer feels about season 7. After all, he spent 10 years writing this Netflix series. It achieves what he intended to achieve – to depict a remarkable, historical story of great interest in the most entertaining way, and help Netflix to establish a solid reputation for its series.
I love the scripts that sound natural and smart enough to make me smile, cry, and try to look into the historical facts more. A fascinating royal life is portrayed right in front of us vividly, and the acting looks so real. What’s more I’m looking for. Maybe a change in Diana’s tragic story. Can she be the Queen in a TV series, instead of dying with a weird, unattractive man?
Sadly, all the incredible things have to come to an end at some point. I truly respect the decision that no more season 7 is planned. Despite the Crown is fiction, it somehow touches on many historical facts and historical figures in the past 60 years. It reveals the strong emotions the Queen, Diana, Charles, William, and Philip experienced in many events over the years. They have feelings like ordinary people. They look for allies and support from siblings and the other half. Some are more successful than others.
The writer Peter Morgan expressed that he wanted to remain a careful distance from the present and keep the series historical, not journalistic. There are enough writings of royal stories. There is no doubt he is an expert in the area. I feel relieved that the series ends with a happy ending. Our spirits need a boost and the royal family seems to bring hope and joy to the Brits.
“Beyond the satisfaction level of income, you can buy more pleasurable experiences, but you will lose some of your ability to enjoy the less expensive ones.” I read this quote from the book, “Thinking Fast and Slow” by Daniel Kahneman.
I’m never rich but I can relate this idea to what I experienced when I travelled first time. I sat by the window seat, feeling excited to see the plane flying among the clouds. A simple experience was a mere pleasure when I saw Paris, Greece, or Italy. The enriched culture, exotic appearance of people, and even the night train had become very sexy! I could survive with baguette for a few days, or sample cheese and skip my lunch.
After years of travel, I start to look for something more “fascinating” to stimulate the senses, or just lie on the beach in a resort enjoying sunshine and good food.
The book talks about the measurement of well-being by U-index. What’s well-being? Health? Happiness? This index refers to the proportion of time people spend in a negative emotional state while commuting, working, or interacting with people around them. If you sleep 8 hours, you commute, work, and enjoy time with families for 16 hours. If your U-index is 25%, that means you feel emotional discomfort or pain for around 4 hours.
The measurement is solely a perception of how you feel rather than the actual health conditions. People who feel more positive and can bear pain might be better off in well-being. According to Kahneman, higher income can mean that you can buy more pleasures by obtaining luxurious goods or having nice vacations, but that does not translate to emotional experience. Therefore, better life satisfaction does not equal enhanced well-being.
Another interesting point he points out is that people with religious faith enjoy positive affect and stress reduction, but they cannot reduce any feelings of depression or worry. Nevertheless, the idea of perception is very powerful, not only in marketing but also in happiness and well-being. The next question is how can we generate positive energy and feel better in the long run.
Giving colleagues small farewell gifts is a popular ritual in Hong Kong. In the past few months, I received a pineapple snack, a biscuit, a tasty pudding, and today, a fortune cookie and a doughnut from a colleague who left the team and transferred to a new post with better pay. My boss also treated us to a Japanese tempura restaurant. Both the noodles and tempura made my palate very satisfied. The free deep-fried octopus and sesame mochi are also tasty.
Planning such treats is not easy. In a large corporation and a mixed office, should I give away cakes to colleagues with whom I have no interaction at all? How about the office, of which I barely know but one or two people? It was not an easy choice. And the cost of gifts can easily shoot up to a few thousand if it involves so many departments.
I never like to buy a lot of souvenirs when travelling. However, working in a large organisation with a lack of decent pantry space makes it difficult to distribute snacks efficiently. I definitely plan to have rooms for snacks on my upcoming trip.
When my desk is constantly filled with snacks from colleagues, there is no way to avoid the chance to return those favours.
Since we aren’t allowed to accept gifts from customers or vendors, I’m not sure whether my supervisor would like to give us goodies. A free mooncake can briefly make you happy. The perfect food for a lengthy Zoom meeting is Greek yoghurt.
Sometimes I feel like a spoiled child, but I’m glad I don’t have to stress about how much money to contribute towards dinner or a farewell present for my coworker.
I deliberately plan my work with delightful moments sometimes, for example, having a site visit followed by a lantern-making workshop during lunchtime. Another day, I headed to the lantern riddle event after the lunch break, extending my ME time at work.
My desk is now full of lanterns by the window. Even the hospital tuck shop is having a good mid-autumn festival promotion for ice creams, popsicles and drinks. The mid-autumn festival celebration has become a huge thing this year.
My friend often reminds me to refocus on positive thoughts even though I have found pain in my ear, tightness in my back muscle or constipation. We always want to get rid of the dreadful, awful feeling, but wait! Hang in there. I did try, and it was not easy.
Friends’ support and a pleasant work environment give me a cheerleading effect.
“Acknowledge the unpleasant feelings with gentleness and kindness. Feel them with curiosity instead of strong negative thoughts,” my friend reminded me. Of course, seeking treatment or relaxation to soothe those feelings if possible.
I did find deep breathing for hours could soothe my ear pain one day. Yeah! It takes such a long time to wind it down. I thought my body wanted to tell me I shouldn’t ignore the headache, so it passed on to my ear. Anti-inflammatory ear drops could help.
I was convinced to break my prejudice to enjoy a kiwi fruit a day for constipation. Other options can be laxative medicine or probiotic tablets. Exercises and massage are also helpful. But hot pad, kiwi, vegetables, stretching and walking/running are the best solution for me. I opt for natural options if possible.
Compared with corporations and small businesses, I’ve found hospitals put more effort into supporting staff in stress management, especially in the rehabilitation hospital where I’m working now. After all, most patients are frail and old. Without an open heart and a positive mindset, patient conditions can affect one.
Typically, people who are either less educated or in middle age work as patient care assistants in Hong Kong. They can be very gossipy workers, but many tend to just focus on enjoying a good meal rather than focusing on the pain that patients are suffering. Wards can be a high-risk environment, but no one knows what will happen the next year. So, just live in the present moment.
More celebrations to come before the mid-autumn festival on 29 September – volunteer programme for patients, team lunch, etc. After all, restrictions are kept for too long for life enjoyment.
Born in Wellington, New Zealand and lived in several countries during his childhood, Richard Curtis finally resided in the UK and is known as one of the most successful directors of romantic comedy movies, many of which leave us fond memories, like Love Actually, Notting Hill, Bridget Jones’s Diary and Yesterday.
His film “About Time” may not be at the top of the list when you go to the movie. The storyline is as simple as another time-travelling story. The plot is also cut to the chase about an ordinary young man looking for love and happiness. When he learned from his father that he could time travel, he attempted to go back in time to reverse his “actions” to impress the girl he just met. He was kind with a good heart and he tried to help his roommate in his theatre debut. Applause to the great success eventually!
Sadly, the girl he loved was gone because of what he had changed. Life has many paths. They are intertwined. Redirection of a path leading to a series of life changes. We then saw this young man very focused on chasing this girl no matter how many hurdles he went through. So happy to see they crossed paths again and became a couple. Despite the temptation from another beauty, he was not shaken with his goal, instead, he proposed to his love and built a family.
His newborn daughter was so pretty like his wife, so adorable that let you forget the trouble in life. He was so joyous and content with the new life. In this journey, he connected with his father more, especially when unfortunate news came. His father got cancer.
The father and son had a heart-to-heart talk. “We’re all travelling through time together, every day of our lives. All we can do is do our best to relish this remarkable ride.”
His dad told him his secret formula for happiness – get on with ordinary life, living it day by day, like anyone else; and live every day again almost exactly the same. The first time with all the tensions and worries that stop us from noticing how sweet the world can be, but the second time noticing.
He went one step further by not travelling back at all and trying to live every day as if I’d deliberately come back to this one day, to enjoy it, as if it was the full final day of an extraordinary, ordinary life.
There were a lot of remarkable quotes that relate to enjoying life. The scripts were wittily written with a sense of humour.
I share some of the quotes below and feel free to check out more.
“He says worrying about the future is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubble gum. The real troubles in your life will always be things that never crossed your worried mind.”
“I always knew we were a fairly odd family. First, there was me. Too tall, too skinny, too orange. My mum was lovely, but not like other mums. There was something solid about her. Something rectangular, busy and unsentimental. Her fashion icon was the queen. Dad, well, he was more normal. He always seemed to have time on his hands… All in all, it was a pretty good childhood.”
Bill Nighy played the dad role. He is subtle, very British and was excellent in his acts. The son was tall, and skinny with orange hair. Nothing extraordinary. His life was not an excitement. He had friends who were not that smart, too. But he was kind with an open heart. That made the movie more sweet as people could resonate with the storyline more.
Time travelling can be a good trick, but it proves that living an ordinary life is not a bad thing if you learn to enjoy the moment.
After the once-in-a-lifetime horrendous rainstorm in Hong Kong, the weekend remains cloudy and rainy. Obviously, my motivation for going out is less. I had a vibe for music to boost my mood on a Sunday morning.
The random song list came up with “Vincent” by Don McLean, who tells a story of Vincent van Gogh suffering from a mental disorder. I sang along with the lyrics, which were beautifully written. Only people who suffer from mental disease can get to know the pain of emptiness as if it is a “darkness in my soul” and “no hope left in sight on that starry night”. Even his self-portrait looks like “weathered faces lined in pain.” As a matter of fact, van Gogh’s paintings are a means to “try to set them free”.
Van Gogh did not have doubts about his own talent but somehow was not content with it. The other artist could not bear to live close to him. He felt abandoned.
After having practised mindfulness for a while, I am even more sensitive to my feelings and thoughts. I’ve found myself more creative and having more thoughts when watching a movie or listening to a song.
I am not short on creativity and am inspired by stories, songs and books. When there are more thoughts in mind, many brilliant ideas are in your head. Artists like Van Gough and Yayoi Kusama created tons of great works despite their psychiatric conditions.
Recently, Don McLean was accused of emotionally abusing his daughter and wife over the years. So his lyrics say “And now I understand what you tried to say to me…How you suffered for your sanity…
How you tried to set them free,” I don’t know if the writer can relate to his feelings because his mental state was unstable at the time and he hurt his family without realising it.
Discussion of well-being in the early days was uncommon. People probably considered Van Gogh a lunatic at the time, as he cut his own ear off. His artistic work is, no doubt, very memorable with his “flaming sunflowers” and “daffodils”.
The lyrics of Starry Starry night precisely depicts the life journey of Van Gogh, very well-written.
People sometimes subconsciously make a working and learning environment an unhealthy place without realising that they treat others unfairly or abuse them emotionally. And we have to stand up for ourselves, fight for fairness and stop abuse from happening.
Starry, starry night Paint your palette blue and gray Look out on a summer’s day With eyes that know the darkness in my soul
Shadows on the hills Sketch the trees and the daffodils Catch the breeze and the winter chills In colors on the snowy linen land
Now I understand What you tried to say to me And how you suffered for your sanity And how you tried to set them free
They would not listen, they did not know how Perhaps they’ll listen now
Starry, starry night Flaming flowers that brightly blaze Swirling clouds in violet haze Reflect in Vincent’s eyes of china blue
Colors changing hue Morning fields of amber grain Weathered faces lined in pain Are soothed beneath the artist’s loving hand
Now I understand What you tried to say to me And how you suffered for your sanity And how you tried to set them free
They would not listen, they did not know how Perhaps they’ll listen now
For they could not love you But still your love was true And when no hope was left in sight On that starry, starry night
You took your life, as lovers often do But I could’ve told you Vincent This world was never meant for One as beautiful as you
Starry, starry night Portraits hung in empty halls Frame-less heads on nameless walls With eyes that watch the world and can’t forget
Like the strangers that you’ve met The ragged men in ragged clothes The silver thorn of bloody rose Lie crushed and broken on the virgin snow
Now I think I know What you tried to say to me And how you suffered for your sanity And how you tried to set them free
They would not listen, they’re not listening still Perhaps they never will
The family of Coco Lee calls for a formal appreciation of singers’ contribution to society. Elton John was knighted by Queen Elizabeth II for his services to music and charitable service” in 1998. He then became Sir Elton John.
Canada’s top singer kd lang received the Order of Canada title in 1996 for her dedication to Canada and her remarkable talent. In 2018, she was awarded Alberta’s highest honour, the Alberta Order of Excellence. The presenter praised her for demonstrating the power of being true to oneself.
We are influenced by the era of social media in which influencers and friends simply show mostly the good sides of themselves – a perfect body, a luxurious vacation, a handsome boyfriend, a sumptuous meal, and cool friends while some influencers tend to draw attention with negative headlines.
With optimised algorithms and AI technology, YouTube, Vimeo, Facebook and IG feed us similar stories based on what we have clicked or viewed. The “daily viewing platform that they shape encourages one to read a one-sided story instead of having a look at the whole picture. It is not uncommon to see more people having a polarised view. Confirmation bias is not unusual.
Will clear viewing history in our browser help? Not many like to do so as our browsing history makes our life easier in some ways.
Modern society is fast-paced, and many people consider it a merit when they successfully adapt to this upbeat living environment. People, young and old, constantly swipe their phones every single minute. They have packed schedules for work, meetings, and social life. How about a break? Many consider it a waste of time.
How about sleeping more? Sleep deprivation is normal, not an option as YouTube videos, homework, clubbing, and chores are always a top priority.
My friend once asked me, “What do you think about doing nothing at home?” I was puzzled by this question at the time. I was simply young and naive about the benefit of enjoying the time of doing nothing.
In the finale of season 2 of And Just Like That, Carrie proposed a toast at the “Last Supper” before moving out of her favourite apartment, which she has lived in for over a decade. While she was finally ready to let go of this cosy apartment in a posh area, she invited her guests to think of the things they would like to let go of.
We always hold on to many little things, memories, or ideas, no matter if they are good or bad. Zen masters told us to train ourselves to remain calm through meditation or mindfulness. If our brains can let go of worries, hate, anger, and greed, we can enjoy peace in our minds. It’s easier said than done.
Choosing to land in another relationship, Anthony let go of “control”, and his new partner let go of “Rome”, where he comes from.
Seema let go of “distrust” as she finally takes up a serious relationship with a director who is very business-minded and has to live in the Middle East for half a year.
Miranda and another character both chose “guilt” because of the relationship issue and the crazy thought about giving up the baby.
Nya is giving up “yesterday” as she is so happy to hit on the Michelin chef. Carrie picked expectations,” and as she explained, sometimes things turn out better than expected somehow.
Expectations are a huge word. When I studied marketing, the lecturer emphasized the role of expectations a lot. People are guided by hopes and expectations when making purchase decisions instead of economic factors.
When we meet someone special, we have a set of expectations that may determine whether a relationship can or cannot work. When we interact with our family members, we expect our parents to support us or our siblings to be our good friends.
Letting go of “fear”, “guilt”, and “regret” is something we commonly do successfully for our well-being. My therapist once said, “Don’t set my expectations that high, so I won’t be that disappointed in the end.”
Do I expect myself to be a high achiever every time? The company I had worked with for years let me down so badly that it hurt me so much. I set up a massive database, established a solid communication policy, built rapport with reporters, drove business enquiries from campaigns, and offered insights on increasing website traffic and hitting on keywords. I should have been more assertive and protected myself when the selfish supervisors belittled me for keeping their own benefits. That ruined my well-being. Working for a company like this is totally unhealthy.
I’m happy that I shifted my job role to focus on helping those who are more in need in an organisation that engages to promote a healthy environment.
I let go of my regret about not leaving that company earlier and my fear of not jumping out of my comfort zone much earlier. Now I am a sponge. The world is big. I try to absorb every new thing in life.
I still cannot let go of expectations; I just set my bar lower while adding wisdom from people around me every day.
A friend of mine took a new job which is very fast-paced. Every time I called her, She thought she could hardly survive one more day in the new company, so she has been nagging about it from time to time. Anyhow, she finds her way to de-stress from this hectic job.
No matter how late it is when she is back home. She spends an hour preparing her dinner and another hour to enjoy her meal. The dinner she prepared is nothing fancy but a proper meal for the family – three dishes with a bowl of rice. I’m amazed how she has such an energy to do so when she’s home at 8 p.m. I would have starved to death. The thoughts of comfort food give her the mental power and energy to do so, even the dishwashing. “I love my plates and kitchen spotless clean”, she said it with great excitement.
Talking about food therapy, I decided not to bring a heavy lunch box to the office every day, but buy take-out from time to time. The new workplace is quite a distance from the subway station and restaurant areas, therefore going out for lunch is such a rush, and there are not many good options.
Canteen meals are typically oily and not very appetising. Luckily the nearby cafe now offers some pre-order choices. If I really yearn for Thai or Vietnamese food, I always encourage my colleagues to order via a food app together. Trying out a variety of food motivates me to have a more pleasant and productive afternoon. People who are chunky should love themselves for loving good food.
This simple change of routine definitely makes me happier. I let go of saving every penny by bringing lunch boxes. Unlike a friend of mine, I still do not like to invest a lot of time in cooking dinner. Having more free time to enjoy stretching, exercising, watching TV or even being idle can improve my well-being.
Recently, people stocked up on sea salt because Japan released nuclear wastewater into the sea. A psychiatrist related this phenomenon to seeking security. Another example is the stocking up of amenities and food during the pandemic.
My friend’s storeroom is a semi-grocery store. Why does she need 5 chocolate bars, and 5 bottles of detergent while our living space is so limited? She told me that the storage gave her comfort and she was not scared when supermarket shelves were emptied by the crazy crowd. Another friend of mine has an apartment full of canned soup and food, too.
Even though supermarkets and grocery stores are nearby in Hong Kong, human beings very much need a high level of storage to feel secure and safe
With the typhoon approaching, I purchased more snacks and food to reach that security level and to feel at ease.
experience today 