Tag: #love

Chinese articles

宗教信仰的得著

experiencetoday

麥嘉是上一代的電影人，於美國修讀電子工程，不甘於過著平凡的生活—畢業後養妻活兒，再借錢渡假。他愛冒險，希望快點成名，便嘗試修讀電影，滿腔熱忱地加入電影界，毅然回港創一番事業。

他由演員做起，也當起西片的副導演，曾有一次導演要求短時間內要臨記，電影圈不能說不可能，否則您會被取替。二十多歲的小夥子學習了電影圈的一課。

事業低潮時，沒有工作可做。可幸是，他天生性格樂觀。事實上，並非每一套電影都能夠成功。失敗與成功與否，他認為這視乎是否學懂一些東西，儘使這部戲不賣座，當是一個考驗，學習失敗的點子後，下一套戲是一個新機會。

有人跟他說是所有新聞是中立，要視乎你如何演繹。雖然現代的新聞已加入不少立場，不過如何演繹完全是因人而異，樂觀點看會開心一點。

麥嘉中年時，面對一班新人出現，主動尋找宗教。他感到基於以前的經驗，似乎困在一個框架，難以突破發揮其所長。一天，他從雜誌閱讀了一篇文章，有關一位科學家信奉宗教後，突然成就其科學研究。

宗教可以刺激腦部94%未開發的潛在意識。若不從宗教入手，也可以認識新的朋友、到訪新的社會環境、學習新的知識，幫助自己重生，然而宗教可能幫助更多。

緣份讓他與佛結緣，樂於修練，感覺到添加了不少智慧，擴闊了宇宙觀的感覺，最後請別人拍戲尋求突破。

在人生道路，他亦遇到其他一些障礙，宗教給予他一些哲理，幫助化解了一些事情，例如投資失利，當然不開心； 但反思後，宗教的哲理給予一些啟示，感到失去金錢後，其實錢不是你的，有錢人未必快樂，為何如何執著呢？

他對宗教的另一領悟是—人生不存在擁有，在存付出，故此做善事才是心安理得和給自己暖意的事情。

English articles

The real price of dinner

experiencetoday


A 10% service charge is usually added to my bill when eating in a restaurant in Hong Kong. We expect to pay more for tipping. Fast food outlets and Hong Kong-style cafes are exceptions. In general, it is not too difficult to figure out the real price of my meal. My friends and I can sit down, eat our meals, and talk freely.

Dining in New Zealand and Japan is simple because I don’t have to figure out taxes, service fees, or tipping. What I see on the menu is what I will pay for. I like this practice as travelling on a tight budget may add stress when spending too much on meals. I prefer focusing on travel experiences such as enjoying the wonderful scenery, checking out an awkward rock formation, or visiting lovely penguins. 

Surprisingly, my friend told me that Kiwi restaurants may add a surcharge to the bill during public holidays, such as Christmas Day or Easter Sunday. This is 10% to 15% more to cover the higher manpower costs and operational costs of running a restaurant on a public holiday. A surcharge at the weekend is not common, but restaurants can do so.

Luckily, I didn’t come across this when visiting New Zealand. I was at the Agricultural Show and enjoyed good snacks outdoors. Prices were reasonable, and the tastes were fantastic.

Having to calculate the service charge and tip myself made me nervous about dining out in Canada and the USA. I felt embarrassed if I paid too little, and then I felt ripped off when I paid too much. I once ordered a coffee in a vineyard. When the waitress looked at me, I realized I had overpaid for the drink. I should calculate the service charge based on the pre-tax price. Well, I just smiled at her and wished her a good day.

English articles

How to enjoy your travel

experiencetoday

I am delighted to discuss travel with many others again on the Clubhouse platform. We’re not trying to compete with each other over where we’ve been; we’re sharing what we’ve enjoyed on our travels. 

Thailand seems to be a popular destination for Americans in Asia, as it’s got a lot to offer, beaches, tasty food, islands, and inexpensive shopping. 

Some people got the luck to travel as part of their business trips, so they were able to save a lot of money on their flights. Some live in a vast country where the West coast or Mid-West could be a lot different from where they live. 

In your 30s, Thailand was your favourite place, and Paris will be your favourite place when you are older. I disagree. I could imagine people having different reasons to travel to certain places. I travelled to Canada a few times because of meeting people and music. The flight is not that pleasant unless you are in business class. Then I came to Japan at different ages and each time, the experience was totally different. 

The first time I went to Europe, I was broke and had a limited budget. My friends and I survived on pieces of bread or food samples. We stayed in hostels, or even on night trains or on a beach. It’s such an experience that could hardly be replicated at my age now. 

Overall, I can see that new experiences, connections with nature, and friends are what make travel the most exciting for me. I could still remember the travel guide in Sri Lanka. He could only speak a little English but he did a great job driving us around and trying to arrange everything according to the itinerary. 

I could recall how excited I was seeing sheep in the Netherlands, Niagara Falls in Canada, and bathing on a high floor in a hotel in Shanghai. Definitely, the list could be expanded in the future. 

The planning process can be tedious but it can be fun and enjoyable as well, giving me some sense of uncertainty and great expectations as well. 

Hello, Europe. Hello, Japan. I’ll come to explore your heritage, your food, and your culture soon.

potatoes
English articles

Growing potatoes

experiencetoday

Learning to grow vegetables on a small farm improves mental health and well-being. The joy of harvesting vegetables is beyond buying something that I like in a shop.

Today and yesterday, I took home a few potatoes from the community farm. Some were tiny, some were regular. All are organic and no pesticides are used. The skins are particularly tender and thin, so it is easy to rub them out for cooking.

Growing potatoes is very easy. Seed potatoes are handy when the “eyes” grow bigger and wider over a week or so. Simply put the seed potatoes in the soil with the eyes facing up. In January, when the sun was scarce, my brother planted around 6 seed potatoes. Surprisingly, they grew fast.

I was told that each seed potato produces 4 to 8 potatoes. So far, I have harvested 7 potatoes. They are quality produce, organic, and enough for 3 meals.

It is quite a lazy plant as some of my farm mates just leave them there on their farms. I could see potatoes near the root of the plants.

It took less than three months for me to harvest the first crop. The skin of some potatoes is exposed to the soil when they come close to the surface. I simply added some soil on top till they turned from green to yellow.

potato plants

Basically, when the leaves turn yellow, it is a sign that they are almost ready.

Since last summer, I have felt the power of horticultural therapy. Gardening, such as loosening the soil or planting sprouts individually, makes me feel mindful.

Learning what produce is cultivated on a farm is fun; growing from seed to harvest is surely a sense of achievement. I had beans and okra for two months in summer and now have potatoes in spring. Mints and herbs are usually grown in any season here.

Want to learn more about farming? Farm mates and an instructor taught me how to manage the farm and grow some vegetables. Many YouTube videos can help as well.

grit
Chinese articles

不能選擇的使命

experiencetoday

一位朋友陪伴探望我喜歡的『貓醫生』，我雀躍地跟她分享了一些心理學書本和網上討論渠道之餘， 也可以一齊做一些伸展，身心好像多了一份温暖的感覺，注入了多巴胺dopamine，也增加了與友人互動關懷所產生的oxytocin催產素。

人與人的接觸，真的不要介懷接受別人的幫助，其實別人也可能得著不少。我期望身體回復狀態，能夠閱讀和學習更多。年青時，在公關公司工作時，同事都著意自己有否『自我提升 (grow)』的機會，新一代希望在工作中有更多發揮和自主性，原來已經不再年青的我，也希望像新一代畢業生般在工作中享受這份自主的滿足感，而不單是聽從指示辦事，我深信每個人都有其長處，冀能得到別人的信任和尊重，發揮當中的『使命』，令自己更熱愛生命。

晚上如常追看電視劇，劇中的一位醫生心𥚃有點感到不安—醫生的使命是挽救生命，不能計較病人的背景、就算病人做盡壞事，醫生不能有私心，不能拒絕不治療病人，遇到一些罪犯，內心可能有點掙扎，但亦要保持專業的精神。

我們活著的大環境似乎越來越多東西不在我們掌握和控制之內，工作環境也是一樣。我們的誕生，必有其獨特使命，只要努力不懈，終能夠發揮所長，這份使命感也會轉化成為滿足感，推動我們更加享受生命。

我要學習心理學家Angela Duckworth提出Grit堅毅的精神，在熱情passion和毅力perseverance方面多加努力。

#grit

English articles

The happiest garden in the world

experiencetoday

My friend’s New Zealand trip just began. She followed my advice to explore the small French Akaroa town south of Christchurch. 

The Giant’s House is one of the key attractions in this picturesque town by the harbour. I missed visiting this special garden last year, and I can only blame the rain for that decision. After all, the joyous garden should be a place for taking pictures. Going there in the rain is no fun. 

My friend shared this Giant’s House with me, which was built by artist and horticulturalist Josie Martin. The house was built in 1880 by a bank manager who came from England. When Josie bought the place over 25 years ago, the house needed serious repair and had no garden. 

Josie has always enjoyed gardening and is passionate about art and sculpture. She has a dream of sharing her art with the community in a playful and magical environment.  Her house in Akaroa therefore has become a blank canvas for her creative work.

She turned fragments of lovely old china buried in the ground into mosaics for the floor of the conservatory and steps. The idea worked well. With the help of local craftsmen, her installations evolved and grew. 

The artist called Giant’s House “the happiest garden in the world”, which is full of elaborate, vibrant-coloured sculptures. 

As the artist still lives in the Giant’s House and manages her garden, it feels more alive. 

Why is it called “The Giant’s House?” It was named by a little girl, looking up at it from the valley below, believing it must be the home of a giant.

online dating
English articles

Online dating

experiencetoday

Can a romantic relationship turn into a platonic friendship? 

Unfortunately, the chances are less than 10% based on my experience. Specifically, it refers to the success rate of turning my significant others into friends after a breakup. 

No matter where people are, I enjoy exploring friendships. Somehow, a few turn out to be more than just friends. It takes two to make a romantic relationship work. Imagination enhances such development, especially for those who love someone distantly. 

One of the best things I tried was text chatting with someone without knowing what they looked like for over a month. It’s quite a fun game if you are willing to invest your time and bet on furthering a relationship. 

Distance relationships are more common nowadays, and disregardless of any stigmas, online dating can be fun. Why not try express feelings in various ways – a surprise parcel, a warm voice message, or a cute song transformed by an app? All these contribute to a new fond experience. The wild fantasy simply makes online dating a lot more interesting and engaging.

Waiting for someone you fancy to respond can be anxious. I tried to delay revealing the moment of truth for almost two months.  It was all good with the everyday chats and the closeness that I felt through the conversations. I felt connected. I felt loved. I did not want the bubbles to be gone in a second when the gift box was opened. 

Luckily, the moment of truth just brought us joy and enriched our feelings.  

Chinese articles

多配偶的需要

experiencetoday

二人關係是否容許多一個情人？現代人與人的關係轉化，重視體驗和需要。Netflix 連續劇《You Me Her》便以輕鬆喜劇手法探討多配偶關係。

夫婦多年來的感情隨時間變淡，一位青春無敵的女伴遊給他們一點沖繫。理智地想，丈夫有機會升上校長，妻子是成功的建築師，可以直升為合伙人，大好前程，身住的地區更是傳統中層家庭居住的理想之地，為何要冒這個危險建立三人關係？

妻子從未向另一半透露自己結婚前有數過女朋友，可以相信嗎？

我認為劇集有缺情理，但喜劇歸喜劇，劇情已帶出現代關係的另一種需要，也講出三人關係不單只有性，愛、生活和彼此間的經歷也是如此重要，就算在西方社會，思想較開放，還是遇到不少阻礙和外界不善意的目光。

Netflix的另一生活小品《閨房設計樂》也描述一對前夫婦，與五位男女建立周末共居的關係。每個男女的性格和愛好都有所不同，只是重視性愛體驗，不想受一夫一妻的框架局限自己，也鍾愛周末享受團體生活，不假思索，不用太多安排更可在同一屋下看電影，也開派對。

其實，多年前，《魔登家庭》劇集大熱，不少觀眾都對多配偶的議題感到好奇。鍾於這現代配偶概念的男女就以遠久年代族群共居比喻，彼此扶持的重要性。配偶間的背景、經歷和技能都可以給自己幫助，無論是心靈上、能力上或是簡單的陪伴，都是十分重要的，這正正反映現代人在個體化社會生活其實不時感到孤單，才會引延多配偶的需要，而這些多配偶的關係，以突破一夫多妻或一妻多夫的族群建制，而是男女交叠對外延展的複雜關係。